ALMOST every nation can be described in one or in a few words. The Americans are workaholics, the Germans are meticulous, the Italians are relaxed, and the Croats are what we may call super-smart. Interestingly enough, that superior intellect doesn't come from graduating high school, reading scientific journals and books, studying the world by traveling, having spiritual insights, or developing high technology. It is something Croats are born with.

They know everything, even though Trieste is the farthest they have ever been

Superior intellect is enough for you to know everything about all nations and countries, even if Trieste is the farthest you have ever been from home, and if you can't even read a map. This intellect, coupled with a beer, is enough for you to know more about soccer than all the coaches in the world combined. This intellect supports your assumption that tourism will forever remain a growing sector. It manifests as early as in your youth, when you realize that it's better to cheat on an exam than to study for it. Later in life, it gives you the brilliant idea that you can earn more by betting on games than by working. Basically, your superior intellect allows you to sit in a café or on a promenade and speak confidently about everything without actually knowing anything. You believe that you are more knowledgeable than all the Nobel laureates, academics, and Bill Gates, but at the same time, you despise the path to acquiring knowledge, and above all, those who possess that knowledge.

Needless to say, with superior intellect comes great confidence. That is why you think that you can outsmart the bookmaking system. Or that you understand investments better than someone with an American MBA degree. A long time ago, when tinkering with cars was not as complicated, those with superior intellect boosted the engine of their Yugo to have more power, at the same time forgetting to boost their breaks. A more recent example of this superior intellect was seen in people who invested in rundown apartments, thinking that the number of tourists will keep increasing with each year that passes, as well as that locations such as Africa, Greece, and Turkey that were not safe because of revolutions, strikes or political instability, will never recover.  

How does Croatian superior intellect manifest itself in times of the coronavirus pandemic?

And then, superior intellect meets the coronavirus. Considering that we have some knowledge about the virus, we established some ground rules. Firstly, everyone should wash their hands. Soap destroys the membrane of the virus and renders it harmless. Secondly, closed spaces should be avoided, but if that's not possible, masks should be worn because even cotton masks, when worn by everyone, significantly reduce the possibility of an infection. Thirdly, handshakes should be avoided. Lastly, people should socially distance in open spaces. That's mostly it - a few simple ground rules that significantly reduce the possibility of contracting this virus. In the meantime, we have learned that the virus spreads by droplets of saliva (and not by aerosol particles, which are significantly smaller).

In general, these simple and not overly severe measures are sufficient enough to significantly reduce the possibility of COVID-19 infection in normal circumstances. Croatia has successfully fought off the virus, so to speak.

That's where the greed for the tourists' money comes in, as well as the pre-election campaign. Things became suspicious last week. If thousands of tourists who come to the Adriatic by car become tired and fill the rest stops along the highway (which they did), how are they to keep the necessary distance at gas stations and in restrooms? Furthermore, what will happen when we open the border for the countries which have many more coronavirus cases?

What do the fools from the ATP and WTA know?

Then came the Adria Tour. The ATP and WTA tournaments are currently on pause, but what do they know, we Croats are super-smart, and we will still organize the Adria Tour! Every good Croat is more knowledgeable than the ATP or WTA, and if they have half a liter of beer in hand, they are more knowledgeable than the ATP and WTA combined.

And so, they rushed to organize the Adria Tour, because, well, it's good promotion (and is there a better way to get votes on the Adriatic than by showing the voters how you can get the tourists to visit?). However, as superior intellect disappears into thin air as soon as cameras and microphones appear, almost everyone shook hands, got their pictures taken while standing close together, and then watched the tournament with no empty seats or a 1.5m distance.

Plenkovic achieved his goal, "a great promotion of Zadar and Croatia in the world"

In the meantime, considering that superior intellect is common across the Balkans, the first part of the Adria Tour was held in Belgrade, where the cheerful group of tennis players had a great time in a nightclub after the tournament. They later bragged about partying in Zadar. It was a friendly party with lots of hugging.

Technically, Prime Minister Plenkovic achieved his goal: "This event will be a great promotion of Zadar and Croatia in the world," Plenkovic said on Saturday, not even realizing how right he was. The Adria Tour, especially its second part in Zadar (as we noted, the first part was held in Belgrade), appeared on many covers. Of course, many world media ended up writing about Zadar, i.e., reporting on the return of the coronavirus in Croatia. A bunch of people, sports activities, partying, hugging, shaking hands, sitting in a crowd...what could go wrong?

The truth that no politician wants to tell and few Croats want to hear

All this was a desperate attempt of restoring tourism because no relevant or even new politician wants to tell the simple truth – it is impossible for half the country to live off tourism. They don't want to say it because most people don't want to hear it. The whole story of denying the dangers of the coronavirus (with the exception of conspiracy theorists) boils down to a desperate desire for everything to remain as it was – for the cash from tourism to keep flowing. And that is simply not possible anymore.

As it turns out, there is not much difference between our superior intellect and idiocy.